Helping Children Deal With Hurt and Abandonment - Reality 101

I recently read the heart-rending novel, The Tiger Rising, by Newbery Award winner Kate Di Camillo, with my ten year old. The book was required reading for my son as a part of Reading Circle, where a group of similar readers study a literary work under the direction of the teacher or another adult.

The Tiger Rising features two children, sixth graders Robert Horton Jr. (Rob) and Sistine Bailey. Rob and his father have moved to the small-town of Lister, Florida following the death of Rob's mother, while Sistine has recently moved to Lister with her mother, who'd returned to her hometown after a bitter divorce.

In the beginning, I found the story to be too harsh and hard-hitting for a fifth grader. After all, I didn't think my son was ready to deal with cancer, death, infidelity, or divorce, four ugly realities that, with the exception of death(which is, of course, inevitable), I hope we never have to face. A few chapters into the book, I realized that my son had lots of questions, and the book provided an avenue through which he could share his concerns, and through which I could help him to find answers.

As the title implies, there is a tiger. Rob discovers the caged tiger in the woods owned by his father's employer, an unsavory character named Beauchamp.

Rob, who has been verbally and physically abused by his classmates, comes to trust Sistine, who is belligerent but intelligent, and who understands and appreciates Rob's artistic ability. When Rob takes Sistine into the woods to see the caged tiger, she presents Rob with a dilemma that is solved in an unlikely manner by the two closest adults in Rob's life.

I loved the contrasts in this story. Rob was docile and determined not to fight; Sistine provoked fights with a determination to win or die trying. Rob withheld his feelings, while Sistine roared. Rob dressed simply but had a sensitive, artistic soul; Sistine wore "party dresses" but was determined to fight the world.

The story was told in a soft Southern accent that reminded me so much of the relatives who have passed through my life, as well as my parents, with whom I interface almost daily, that I found myself reading aloud to my son when I didn't have to, hoping that he would pick up cues and clues in the speech patterns that would help him to understand the story.

I had favorites, as well as people who are, thankfully, fictional. There weren't any funny parts to the story, with the exception of a few characterizations. Something about the ways in which the characters spoke made them seem familiar. I was almost transported back to my elementary days, when simple things were complex, and great puzzles had easy solutions.

I do not recommend this story for children to read in isolation. This content should be discussed page-by-page between children and responsible adults, as the opportunity for deep revelation could be an occasion for confusion if a child tried to understand such issues without the safety net of adult guidance, especially if they are far beyond the realm of his or her life experiences.

If you like to read with your children and discuss what you have read, The Tiger Rising would be perfect for you. If you have never discussed death or abandonment with your children, this book is a great springboard. Issues such as cruelty, name-calling, ignorance, violence and grief are also covered. In the right circumstances, a must-read.