My Soul Was Tortured For Only 20 Minutes

The Curse of Gomar and of Owning This Game

The fable goes, that at the age of 25, King Valmek, ruler of Gomar married a princess from the north of his kingdom. Soon he had two sons, Sedan and Felies. On one of Sedan's birthdays, a royal hunt was arranged. During the activities, Sedan was found at the bottom of the cliff, having fallen to his death.

Queen Antea and Felies tried everything to bring Sedan back to life, but nothing worked. Then, in frustration and desperation, they turned to the Darkside (life Darth) and asked the forces of evil to bring Sedan back. Valmek's Chief Swordsman tried to stop the event, but he was slain by Felies. Atlus, the swordsman's son, watched helplessly.

So the King banished Antea and Felies from Gomar, sending his Royal spy, Sayomi to follow them and keep tabs on them. It is learned that Antea and Felies have undying allegiance towards each other and used their new evil powers to envelop the land in a mist that transforms people into beasts and monsters. Felies himself has turned into a dragon to harass Gomar. Sayomi attempts to warn Valmek, but Antea is on top of it all and tries to kill Sayomi and Atlus. In the attack, Valmek's Wizard, Orion saves Sayomi and Atlus, but fails in saving King Valmek. Orion then explains to his two new friends that the only way to save the land is to capture the souls of those turned into monsters and beasts in a magic phial and return to where it all began.

The story sounds longwinded and watching the introduction to the movie proved this so. The intro included King Valmek sitting on his throne describing and retelling the story just as I have above. It's about seven minutes long of boring talk.

The characters are basic stereotypes, or the Brains, Brawn, and Beauty people. Atlus (Brawn) is the warrior of the trio; Orion (Brains) is the wizard; and Sayomi (Beauty) is the spy who originally brought back news of doom.

Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder (and saving graces of horrible games)

The graphics are the only thing that saves this game. A bright atmosphere illuminates only a dismal landscape. There is plenty of detail in the game and the Medevil towns have been done magnificently. It's too bad I didn't care about getting through the levels to enjoy the scenery.

The special effects are done well. There are plenty of explosions and shiny swords to keep you excited to play, but that's where the fun ends.

Smile for the Herky-Jerky and Infinitely-moving camera

The worst part of this game is the camera. Ninety percent of the game you play in third person and the other 10% in the first person (when using long-range weapons). So you run and walk and fight and such and the camera follows you. Somewhat. The camera has trouble turning corners, trouble stopping when you do, trouble turning 360 degrees and/or stopping when you're done turning: basically the camera is smooth in it's movement. This was real irritable when in fighting mode. It was hard to keep the directionals straight when the camera often times switched sides completely, thereby making you change your strategy.

Replay Value? Why would you want to?

Three characters, five levels of repetitive action, dizzying camera movement, frustrating non-fighting controls, and no talking in the in-game cinemas. That's right, there's in-game cinemas that don't feature talking; instead, the characters just grunt. I'm serious, don't laugh.

Kung Fu Grip and Kung Fu Motion Capture

The characters' martial arts moves were motion captures from live people (as oppose to dead) and were captured realistically. Between your four fighting options, (punch/swing weapon, Kick, Block, and Jump), the developers did a fine job in creating combos from such a simple configuration. But like most beat-em-ups, I found a couple of combos that worked really well against the computer opponents.

This game is boring and seem like it was haphazardly put together. "Oh, let's rip of Gauntlet Legends, water down the plot, and make the player seem like they're in a roller coaster when the camera moves," the makers at REDorb said then coming up with a game idea.

Well, if that was their plan in the first place, they did a great job. Otherwise, steer clear--way clear--of this game. Pick up a shovel and hit yourself instead.