Masterfully crafted

I have seen this movie approximately 542 times. I'm usually not one for multiple-viewings, but circumstance (it being the only video owned by my family) and a great love of the movie converged to cause me to watch it again and again and again. The first time I saw it, in a movie theatre many years ago, I liked it, but not excessively. Through my repeated viewings I have come to appreciate how well-put-together the movie is. Most movies are filled with dramatic emotions, especially love, but ring a bit false. That's all fine and good in plenty of movies, they aren't supposed to mirror reality. But when a movie like sex,lies and videotape comes along it's startling. Like most members of the movie viewing world, I've seen thousands of falling in love scenes. I usually grasp that the characters have fallen in love by the violin music playing and them looking longingly into each others' eyes. In sex,lies and videotape and in real life, it's more subtle and deeper. The director, Steven Soderberg also paid close attention to how people really talk and reflected it in his movie. People in movies seem to always know what to say and their words come out with a fluency, no false starts, no um's etcetera, that no one can attain in real life, especially under emotional duress.
The plot of the movie involves an upperclass repressed housewife, Ann, played by Andy McDowell (under Soderberg she does a wonderful job for which I will continue to respect her no matter how many other movies she damages, her slimebag husband, her co-slimebag (but with a good heart) sister and the videotaping, truth-speaking weirdo Graham, played perfectly by James Spader. The movie's scope is large within the small story. Honesty, Love, Betrayal, all intentionally uncapitalized because this is not just about the concepts, but about them in every day life.
This is the movie that launched Sundance into meaningfulness. It isn't, of course, a blockbuster action movie. There are a few sex scenes that might satisfy those who rent it for the title, but mostly it's talk and emotions.