The Monster goes to church.

The house-brand cables we bought from that website that claims to be a friend to musicians barely outlasted their warranty. When we proposed dropping nearly 4 C-notes on a dozen 20-foot Standard 100 mike cables to our church's finance council, the words "Lifetime Warranty" were the clincher.

Hum? Forget about it. Cell phone static? Thing o' the past. CB radio interference? Tunes it right out. The secret is twisted pair construction, which eats up an extra inch or so of wire per foot of finished cable. The signal becomes its own electronic shield against noise. Cheaper cables use a side-by-side or linear configuration, which acts as an antenna and attracts all kinds of electromagnetic gunk from the air.

The jacket resists twisting and uncoils smoothly. It also rolls up for storage without fighting back like an overcaffeinated snake.

The ends are finished with somewhat oversize connectors, providing a generous grip for smooth insertion and removal, but they can be a hindrance for performers who like a grab a mike off the stand and solo. That's not a problem in a church choir, so we expect the cables to last a long time. If you need a cable with a slimmer connector, move up to the Performer 500 or Studio Pro 1000 series.

The finishing touch in our sound setup is the Monster Cable S-100 instrument patch cord and an attenuating adapter for hooking our mixer to the sound system. Velvety-quiet signal transfer and audio quality that's good to the last note.

We have yet to use the Lifetime Warranty but the peace of mind is, well, as good as a gift from God.