May "The Black Guy" Live On

It's 3:00 a.m. me and my best bud are high on smacks (you know the cereal with the frog on it), we're bored out of our minds when suddenly we flip onto the movie "Freejack". I would love to recount the story to you you, but we were too busy laughing at the horribly bad acting, bad special effects and bad script.

All that I know is that Emilio Estavez is transported to the future just before he dies in a race car crash (which is depicted with horrible special effects). The future world is polluted and disease ridden, and the Freejacker's body is some rich guy's (who is stereotypically evil) ticket to immortality.

Now in this bleak future, there are a few things I find disturbing #1 Emilio's girlfriend hasn't aged a day since his "death" which had occured 8 years before, and neither has his best friend. #2 Why no hovercars? In all futuristic movies of that era, the directors included HOVERCARS! (I love hovercars).

Now what we enjoyed most about this film was one certain character. We never heard his name (once again we were too busy laughin) so we dubbed him "The Black Guy". As you can guess, he was a black bodygaurd. He did some @$$ kicking and then died, but we spent the rest of the movie imagining cool ways in wich he could re-appear. Example:

Mick Jagger(Main Bad Guy): Now I've finally got you Freejacker! (Points laser stun gun at Emilio)
Emilio: Looks like this is the end!
(Mick Jagger unzips skin and step out as Black Guy)
Black Guy: Don't $hit yo pants, it's me black guy!
Emilio: Hey black guy wassup!

We love "Black Guy" so much that we vowed to get a copy of Freejacker and make posters of Black Guy out of certain cells which depicted him in the coolest way.

SEE THIS MOVIE