Underproduced, Uncalled for, Unnecessary, underwhelming and STILL Madonna's Best

In every Madonna review so far, I've stated (in one way or another) Madonna's best is EROTICA, the so called "sex" album that disappointingly sold only 2 million copies while her book, non-ironically called SEX, sold much more. There is no real explanation to this, as EROTICA is a damn masterpiece, but undoubtedly, it's a masterpiece in disguise; a disguise that can easily be read by music lovers and can easily be missed by music listeners.
You see, EROTICA isn't really... erotic. It's erotic in some ways, though, it mainly deals with heartbreak, unhappiness, doubt, the whole nine yards. The CD, once I picked it up about a year ago, I sensed it wasn't really meant to be erotic. It was meant to be disguised as erotic but under the thick skin lies a mysterious face cover, a dark, gritty image of Madonna sucking a toe and in the sleeve of the album, tons of "erotic" pictures that are ultimately coated with dark color schemes and blank texture. I knew so much about music back then (and still do) that the disguise didn't work on me. From the titles of each song, I knew it was just a disguise. "Deeper and Deeper" sounded like a typical sex song when reading the title but I knew it had to be more than that. "Bad Girl" and "Waiting" do the same and as it turned out, I was completely right.

The album begins with the title track. A misleading bass loop starts it off but the song quickly turns into a mid-temp groove that can either be read as an erotic music piece or a soulless change of path into unemotional sex tension. It quickly catches the attention of anyone who dears to listen to the catchy but loud jazz-like horns, as it should. It was easily meant for public reaction and Madonna does this well. She sounds sexy but at the same time, removed into a stylistic yet confusing convergence.
This goes on for a while throughout the entire album. "Fever" and "Bye Bye Baby" both sound out of place at where it actually should be but at the same time, both are highly enjoyable pieces if you don't catch the fact. "Fever" is a highly danceable track that should be the easiest to sing along to and the easiest to dance to. Although, Madonna sings in not a fun or sexy way but in a depressed manner, almost on the verge of actually whispering the lyrics. It's as if she used the dance groove to hide the emotion but instead made a gunky dance tune that confuses the one who actually cares to feel what she's feeling. As for "Bye Bye Baby," which is supposed to sound a bit angry than it is, it instead comes off as removed and distorted. It works well for those who know what Madonna is doing but for those who don't, they'll just have to play along with her disguise and rock their heads with the hip-hop beat.

Songs such as the catchy yet slow mellow tune of "Where Life Begins" and "Words" do the same method but this isn't the case for all of the songs on the album. Some are self explanatory, with either the topic of depression or self doubt. "Bad Girl" is one of them, a story of a woman who rather see herself being addicted to a drug than break up in a relationship over a R&B beat with sparkly flourishes. Madonna sings in anguish and confusion and it's hard not to feel for her. Another one of these obvious topic songs is "Secret Garden," an ode to jazz while still holding true to the album's hip-hop feel. Like 1990's "Justify My Love," Madonna talks during the verses and sings everything else and it may sound a bit boring at first but once a couple of listens, the words Madonna sings sound hurtful and painful. Especially when she sings the mysterious line:

"I wonder if I'll ever know...
Where my face is... where my place is...
I know it's here somewhere...
I wish I just knew the color of my hair..."

The rest of EROTICA is pure genius. A couple are pure magical dance grooves with catchy pop hooks ("Deeper and Deeper") while one is a mid-tempo ballad with a sexual innuendo ("Rain") and the other is a hip-hop flavored jam that sends a universal message but Madonna doesn't sing it in a way that it supposed to ("Why's It So Hard?"). The only misstep Madonna takes on EROTICA is "Words," an uptempo, angry groove that resonates "Vogue" but confuses me with all the weird combination of everything put into it. It's interesting to listen to but when all of this ends, it was better off on a B-Side. Nonetheless, it's an enjoyable track and that's saying alot. If it's the worst track on the album and is still good, just imagine everything else.

If you don't agree with me on my opinion on EROTICA, it's best you don't even listen to a Madonna album. This album defines Madonna, created what Madonna was and is gonna be afterwards and as a result, became her best album to date. If you can't see that, you'd never understand what Madonna, the Queen Of Music, is really all about. There's more to her than her looks, her wit, and her dance grooves, you know. Underneath her skin is a scared little child, using everything she can as a shield to guard herself against revealing what she truly is. And after 25 to 26 years, none of us have yet to find out.

Bold Tracks Are Best Tracks.

1. Erotica
2. Fever
3. Bye Bye Baby
4. Deeper and Deeper
5. Where Life Begins
6. Bad Girl
7. Waiting
8. Thief Of Hearts
9. Words
10. Rain
11. Why's It So Hard?
12. In This Life
13. Did You Do It?
14. Secret Garden

FINAL SCORE: 4.5/5 (Madonna's Pop Masterpiece.)