Mandatory Madonna: The Hormonal Backlash

The music industry is a strange, strange thing. I've been an avid obsessee with it for many years now, and there's some things I've yet to understand. Long ago it was determined that sex sells records. We've seen this proven with the likes of Britney Spears and the Spice Girls. Oddly enough, their mentor had her biggest flop with a hormonal dance album.

Of course, I'm talking about Madonna. (You are in a Madonna review, if you hadn't figured that out yet.) Miss Ciccone was the original button pusher: she had everyone talking with her coy Like A Virgin and got the world up in arms over her teenage pregnancy anthem Papa Don't Preach. But at her (up to that point) most controversial, she still proved herself as a damn good musician with the strangely religious masterpiece Like A Prayer. But the world hadn't seen anything yet.

After the massive success of foresaid album, Madonna took a bit of time working on other projects, like 1990's Dick Tracy and accompanying soundtrack I'm Breathless. She then released her first greatest hits compilation, aptly titled The Immaculate Collection. This is when she really got heads turning, taking a legendary romp through the strangest hotel on earth over a throbbing pornstar beat, and in the process managed to get banned from MTV. (By the way, if anyone knows where said hotel is, please set me up a reservation.) With all eyes on her (and sales booming, I may add), Madonna took her pulsating beats and racing hormones to a new level with 1992's Erotica.

From the first low, pounding beat of the title track, Erotica, you know you're into a totally different musical styling from the reigning queen of pop. A fitting piano and husky, half-spoken half-sung vocal really manage to put you in the mood with Maddy's impassioned lyrics. "I'll hit you like a truck, I'll give you love, I'll teach you how to - ohhh!" With a high-pitched chorus of "Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body", this song is just flat-out sexy, even with its bondage-friendly lyrics. This is definitely a good, gritty dance song.

She keeps the dance morale going with the first synthesized horns and busy beat on her inspired version of Peggy Lee's Fever. I'm pretty sure the dance beat in this song is the one that is now used in every dance remix ever made, but that's a different story. Maddy's vocals are warm and sultry throughout this song; it's in the perfect range for her. But what's really great about this song is the jazzy instrumentation throughout. With sounds of piano, symbols, horns, and even some orchestral samplings are sparsed generously with the techno-esque beat. This song really gives me fever. *slaps knee*

Erotica does have its pitfalls though, the first of these being Bye Bye Baby. The beat is energetic enough, and the production is great, with "Hey!"s and "Woo!"s put in quietly in the background. But you know if the first lyric samples lyrics from another crappy Madonna song, it can't be that good. "This is not a love song." Thanks, Madge, I've tried my hardest to forget that detestable duet. The real downfall of this song is her voice. She sings in a high pitched, nasally, almost child-like voice, which apart from not sounding at all like her, it sounds like poo. An instrumental of this song would be awesome, but those annoying vocals really ruin the whole thing.

If you thought the rest of Madonna's dance catalog was good, you haven't heard anything until you've heard Deeper And Deeper. It kicks off with a keyboard sounding like a string section, but the dance beat kicks in swiftly and keeps the momentum going. The lyrics are nothing special, but the fast-pace delivery, followed by long, strained notes makes for a terrific and memorable melody. This track inspired many a remix, but the original itself is an awesome tune, with a catchy and energetic chorus, and even a guitar driven breakdown, complete with castanets! The sample straight out of Vogue gives even the clueless the chance to sing along. This is a highlight.

I'd like to direct your attention to something it needs directing to.
A lot of people talk about dining in and eating out.
I guess that's what this song is about.

*gulp* Oh my. Up to this point, nothing on this album had really been that risque, but Maddy is never one to disappoint and offers up a tasty dish on Where Life Begins. It starts out with jazzy piano chords and that terrific, amatory beat and Maddy's sultry spoken vocals. Even her singing vocals fit the mood, being sultry and not at all over the top. If you hadn't figured it out already, this song is about the *ahem*... um. God, I hope my mom doesn't read this. Anyway, this is about the oral pleasures a woman can experience. That's all I'm saying, you can figure it out, I'm sure. "Colonel Sanders says it best. 'Finger Lickin' Good.'". Thank you, Madonna, I'm now scarred for life. It's a good track, though, if you can keep from blushing.

Rest assured this entire album isn't about sex. With the first twinkling, ballad-like beats of Bad Girl, we're brought into the first great ballad on this effort. If you've no idea what this song is about, don't worry, Madonna hasn't been a naughty girl who needs a spanking or anything. On the chorus, she innocently sings "Bad girl, drunk by six, kissing someone else's lips, smoked too many cigarettes today... I'm not happy when I act this way." Musically, this has all the offerings in production the rest of this album has, save the heavy, throbbing beat: jazzy keyboards being the main instrumentation, pieced with a lot of tinkering on the symbols. Maddy's vocals are at her best here, with a sweet sorrow to them. This is a very strong pop offering.

There's not many times on this album that you can feel its age, but one of those times is on Waiting. Making up for all the throb Bad Girl didn't have, this one is extra bass heavy, with not much else besides a pounding beat. The chorus is catchy though, even though Maddy hardly says anything besides "I'm waiting for you, waiting." It gets better later on, with the jazzy rhythm at it's peak, as a gentle piano twinkles away under the Material Girl's sultry spoken vocal. It starts out weak, but actually becomes quite a strong track as you keep listening.

Gentle, hollow chords start off the next track, Thief Of Hearts. But don't let them trick you. Madonna literally shatters that with the sound of a bottle breaking and her enthusiastic cry of "B*tch!". The dance beat kicks in, but this one sounds especially good as the empty chords remain behind it all, piecing this bitter track together. "First she spins her web, then she's stealing your boyfriend." Maddy's vocals are good, even if they're not quite angry enough until she goes into a spoken, dancy rap midway through the song. The production is really good here too, with layers of vocals added to each other a few minutes into the song, with works very effectively. "Stop, b*tch! Now sit your a** down!" Yes, ma'am!

Another slow, sorrowful introduction is interrupted by a very odd dance beat on Words. The jazzy sounds accompany this one as well. "Words. They cut like a knife, cut into my life..." Madge's vocals are nothing special, but decent enough. The production has got all the general elements the rest of the album has had, and it's catchy enough. But at this point in the album, it starts to get a bit monotonous, with the similar production. While this is a decent track, it starts to bleed into the rest at this point.

Thankfully, the error has been noted, and Madonna brings the tempo down on the radio-friendly Rain. Everyone knows this song, but I'll explain it anyway. The instruments provide the hollow chords echoing throughout, over a midtempo beat and a dang catchy melody. Madonna's vocals are terrific, in a husky tone without a trace of sex. They are layered harmoniously, making a terrific blend with the great production. It gets a bit cheesy on the spoken interlude, with different phrases layered over each other. "I will raise from the ground, and without a sound you'll appear, and surrender to me. To love." But it doesn't ruin the song, and even the cliche key change fits into this one perfectly. A very ace song.

Madonna gets the questions going on Why's It So Hard. (Well, he probably looked at that great picture of you sucking a toe.) An odd beat and some kind of really weird sound effects kick this one off. It gets on track though, with the jazzy instruments back in full swing, accompanied by a beat that is neither dancy or throbbing. It's quite refreshing. And it's nice to hear Madge with her mind off sex. (That makes one of us, at least.) "Brothers, sisters, why can't we learn to accept that we're different before it's too late?" The delivery on the verses is dang catchy, with M swiftly uttering various questions on the state of the world. This is definitely a good song.

The keyboard strings and mellow piano sounds start off In This Life, a personal ballad that works very well, in my opinion. The production is kept pretty simple, with the chords, the beat, and the recurring melody backing up Madge's lost, distant vocals. "In this life, I loved you most of all. What for? 'Cause now you're gone and I have to ask myself... what for?" This song deals with a sense loss, and actually tackles a few of issues that were hot topics in society, namely AIDs and homosexuality. I really like this track. It's very simple, honest, and sincere. And that usually makes for a good song.

So speaking of good songs... the complete opposite of that would be Did You Do It?. If you have the edited version of this disc, consider yourself lucky you don't have to sit through this. The beat from Waiting is recycled and rapped over by some guys who probably now wash windshields for food. I have no idea why this is on here, but it sucks.

Some very fancy and easy-on-the-ear piano work starts off Secret Garden, which then invites a strange, but interesting beat. The beat gets heavier as it wears on, but the piano remains constant, making a very jazzy feel to this entire song. Maddy speaks verses softly and in a sultry tone, then kicks into a cozy sung chorus. I actually really like this song. The beat is interesting, and the pianos sparsed without make it very pleasant to listen to, and if you can understand the lyrics, they are pretty good. "I still believe. 'Cause after all is said and done, I'm still alive." It's a nice way to end the album.

Overall, there's no reason that this should have been Maddy's least successful album. All bondage photos in the inlay aside, this CD just has some damn good tunes. It's definitely not an album without flaw, but it's still a very good effort from the reigning queen of the music industry. If you're just getting started on Madonna, save this one for a bit later, but it's definitely a mandatory album for any Madonna fan.

Other Reviews In This Series
The Fluffy Debut
The Formulaic Sophomore Explosion
The Radio Friendly Lovey Dovey Stuff
The Controversial Masterpiece
The Cozy R&B Comeback
The Electronic Maternal Masterpiece
The Foray Into Folktronica
The Directionless Acoustic Experiment